Stimulate Each Other’s Dreams
My fiancé knew I wanted to move back from Amsterdam to NYC when we met and he selflessly supported me and even moved with me. In turn, I helped him prepare for interviews and he found a wonderful job and was recently offered a work visa. We believe in one another and will do whatever it takes to make sure we can both follow our dreams.
Pick Your Battles
It’s natural to disagree on certain subjects or decisions, but it’s important to be able to let the little things go. Relationships are all about compromise and meeting each other halfway.
It’s not only important to talk about fights and arguments it’s also nice to talk about your dreams, goals and aspirations. When my fiancé and I first started dating we would get together at night and I would tell him every single detail of my day. This might be a bit much for most couples but for me it was amazing to find someone who was interested in my opinion and willing to listen to the details of my life. In turn, I love listening to him talk and learn what he finds important and worth sharing.
Whether you have time to eat together every night or almost never, it’s important to schedule a weekly (or bi-weekly) date night. A night where you both dress up and get excited to do something fun together. This could be going out to dinner, gazing into each other’s eyes or even a competitive game of paintball. Pretty much anything you both like to do together which allows you to relax and reconnect.
Put Your Best Foot Forward
Although he should love you without make-up and in sweats it’s important to show him that he’s worth dressing up for. This obviously goes both ways and he should make sure to impress you from time to time too.
Notice when your partner changes his or her hair, outfit, and even nail color. It’s nice to realize your partner in crime notices you and every small detail about you. Show them that you see them and don’t take them, their personality or their appearance for granted.
Be Each Other’s Safe Place
Is your partner having a tough day or week? Make sure you’re the one they feel comfortable coming to for advice or even just to vent. He might not care that my manicurist looked at me funny, but it’s nice to know that he cares that it makes me feel unhappy and sometimes just talking about it makes the negative feeling go away.
Be a Team
Even if you don’t understand why your partner is upset make sure you’ve got their back and stand up for them. Don’t let your friends/colleagues/family insult your significant other (It’s never funny) and don’t be the one that insults them either.
No Phones (Social Media)
Leave your phone at home and take a walk together. It’s the perfect way to spend time together without distractions. Even silently walking next to each other can bring you closer together. My fiancé and I try to do this daily and although it’s great for our relationship it’s not as good for my waistline as we almost always end up at a gelato shop (ice-cream addiction is a real thing).
Keep Your Separate Social Life
I realize I’ve been stressing how important it is to spend time together, but it’s just as important to spend some time apart. Even if you enjoy doing everything together it’s nice to have the option to spend some time with other people every once in a while. Not only because you’ll have something to talk about when you do hang out together, but also to keep a fresh perspective and activities apart from your loved ones.
Go to Bed at the Same Time
I love snuggling in bed and I think it brings couples closer together when they go to sleep at the same time. My fiancé and I are on completely different schedules but when I’m home (even when I’m not sleepy yet) we go to the bedroom at the same time. I love being the last thing he sees before he closes his eyes and me telling him “I love you” be the last thing he hears before he dozes off. I might not fall asleep right away, and watch a movie on my iPad, but being next to him is so much better than sitting in the living room by myself.
Tell Him/Her You Love Them
Tell your partner you love them as often as possible and make sure they listen when you tell them.